While digging through my building last night making sure I had all the Christmas presents out that I had hid over the year I came across a box full of old pictures, letters that I have kept from years past. When I started going through them I realized that there were a lot of old pictures, and art projects of Zaks from when he was little. But this first picture I found melted my heart more than anything else I found. I can remember sitting on the porch this very day in the hot son of Mid July when Zak asked "Chaddy" if he would shave his hair off.... Chad went in got the clippers and they proceeded to shaving Zak's hair. Chad got all of it trimmed off and left just a mohawk and Zak was soooo excited he thought he was super cool for having a mohawk and you can tell by his little smile on his face that it made his day. Unfortunately Chad did not let him keep it cause it wasn't as popular then as it is now and well Chad was just not all for letting his 5 year old "lil brother" run around with a mohawk lol!! But I can remember how for just a few mintues he ran around the yard with out a shirt on or with out shoes on, on this hot day and was actually like a muscle man with his new mohawk cut...He always knew how to melt my heart with that sweet little smile and laugh and those big brown eyes!!
Then I found this.....This almost brought me to my knees...Zak had made a fathers day card for Chad that had his foot print on it from when he was in Kindergarten. Chad was the only male father figure that Zak had in his life and when I found this I had a little peace in knowing that Zak knew how much he was loved by his Chaddy! Even though because of family issues they were not always together I know in my heart Zak knew that our love for him was uncondtional! I am just so very thankful that I have all these pictures and all these crafts from Zak's child hood that I keep finding that are just small reminders that we were his family and it gives me a little bit of comfort each time!
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