Emotions!

So now that I am not so emotionally today I thought I would post about my crazy visit to the Doctor yesterday. Now keep in mind that I am already an emotional person anyway so on top of being pregnant does not help me out at all. When the doctor came into the room we talked for a few minutes about how I had been feeling then she pulls out the paperwork from my ultra sound and says "well everything looks great....except the brain area!!" HELLO, WHAT?? I was so stunned and in panic mode all the sudden that I didnt ask all the right answers. She said they were going to set me up for another ultrasound so they could get pictures of it. She also told me that they were not going to change my original due date of December 5th but the ultra sound read about 6 days earlier....!! Nice that puts it on mine and my sisters bday... SO anyway I leave and get in my car and call Chad and just started crying he kept asking me questions that I really didn't have any answers to. So I called my sister and explained it all to her and once she got me calmed down enough to listen she told me to call or go back up there and ask them the questions. Seeing as how my sister went through this five years ago with Bayleigh I was overly concerned anyway. So I finally calmed down and called back and asked her if there was something I needed to be concerned about, she said "Oh NO, honey we just didn't get any pictures of the brain area because the baby was to active and we need to get some pictures of it." ..........OMG!!!! why did she not jsut say it like that to begin with... Instead you send me into complete melt down and crazy mode over nothing!! I was a mess. I suddenly relaized exactly what my sister went through five years ago when there was something wrong with Bayleigh in the womb. Only they told her the baby wouldn't live outside the womb and it was in the 95th percential of being abnormal. But in reality when Bayleigh was born she was in perfect health....How can they get something like that soooo wrong... Now that Bayleigh is five there are some developmental issues that we are trying to figure out and she is going to the childrens hospital often for testing. But I have a beautiful, loving carefree 5 year old niece who they said would never live outside the womb...HELLO!!!

I am going to continue to pray for my baby to grow healthy for the next 18 weeks, I am also going to pray that God controls me in situations like that and allows me to calm down and ask questions before I get overly emotional...

What a day!!! I was so emotionally exhausted yesterday that I could hardly keep my eyes open.. I am now 22 weeks pregnant and Tarryn really started kicking and rolling last night about 9 pm. so I have a little night owl on my hands already!!!

IT'S A GIRL!!!

Tarryn Rhea Bridges, due December 5th 2009....The ultrasound looked great and she was a wiggle butt...She flashed us within the first minute or two of the ultrasound. I have never really felt a lot of moves until yesterday and she was letting me know that she was there and didn't like us poking around on her. Peyton was sooooo excited. Her and my mom went with me since Chad couldn't leave work. So when we got in the car she called her daddy and told him. I think he was a little dissapointed since this is going to be our last baby. It would have been nice to be able to teach a little boy all the father son things. But he is such a wonderful loving father to Peyton I know that this little girl is going to be wrapped around his finger in no time. God has truly blessed us in so many ways and I give him all the glory for everything...

I am not going to get started on finishing the room and getting the bedding and all that stuff done. I love this part. I got my first little girl outfits from my boss and hiw wife today. They were so cute. My boss of three years will be leaving me to go to Arizonia to be closer to his kids and new grandbaby which is Due in January. I am very sad but I know I would do the same thing if it were me. So now that just means he and his wife Lety will have to be extra nice to me until they leave because I have been giving them a hard time about leaving me...LOL!!

I hope everyone enjoys there weekend!!

Rambling Rambling Rambling!!!

I am that person who loves everyone for who they are not for what they look like or where they came from or the color of their skin. I have always for as long as I can remember been that person who will love you unconditionally, even if you hurt me I will forgive you and continue to love you unconditionally. I may not be the smartest person in the world, nor the most likey to make big bucks in my career but I really believe that my reward is seeing the changes that I can make in other peoples life. Everyday I go through struggles of my own that often hold me back from being that care free person that I know I am. I will just admit that I have been the black sheep of my family, it's not really a bad thing it's just the truth. I have always had different views on EVERYTHING compared to my mom, sister, and brothers. When I was younger I know that my mom struggled with me and my rebellious ways (yea that is right I said it) but for the most part I was always just fighting for what I knew was right. I was fighting for eqal opportunity. For the most part anyway, granted that wasn't all I got in trouble for during my school aged years but we will dust the other stuff under the rug for now. My mom never, and still to this day does not understand why I will not just keep my mouth shut when things don't go right and go with the flow. That is not me though, that may be how she handles her life and job and so on but as for me when I things are bing done incorrectly I am usually the first one to stand up and speak my mind about it. Now let me just stop there and say that sometimes I have spoken my mind on a whim and that has gotten me into trouble but of course not so much trouble that I couldn't get myself out of it. I struggled so much in High School because I had so much potential to change people's life but because of people knocking me down a long the way I choose the same path that several other people chose and did nothing during High School. I had everything I wanted in my teenage days but not everything I needed to keep me on the right path.

I wonder if at some point Jesus ever let the words of others affect him in a way where he choose the same road as everyone else? Or did he ALWAYS know he was the ONE?

I often play my life over and over in my head, why did I choose to quit basketball when I entered into High School?, Why did I date the stupid boy who turned my freshman year into a total madness, I could have done so much better? Why did I choose to get in the car with a drunk driver and risk my life? Why did I ride 4 wheelers like an idiot? Why did I befriend all the people that nobody else would?

I made a lot of stupid decisions in my life but I have to admit that they have made me the person that I am today. It is funny to me how age changes people. The things that I have done a million times as a teenager I would NEVER dare do know EVER...I am some what scared to ride on a 4 wheeler fast and if you know me very well then you know that I use to go places on 4wheelers that were just stupid. I am scared to drive fast, scared to say certain things. I am a believer that everything has a way of coming back to you. I do not want all that to come back to me in my children's life.

I guess I just needed to ramble on about nothing at all....

I guess I am just so thankful that I know God and that he lives strongly in my life. As a teen I didn't realize how important he would be in my life but God has been with me every step of my life and he knew where my life would end up regardless of all mistakes....He is a VERY forgiving GOD!!!

God is Great

This weekend has been GREAT!! The weather has been unbelievable and I have been so relaxed. I went to church today and since then I have just been thinking about how great the service was. I am completly amazed with the young people in our church. They have so much love for God and they are not ashamed to show it. They actually inspire me in so many ways. The feeling I get when I watch all of them on Sunday's is just overwhelming. I grew up in a great church all my life, and I have to say there was only one time in my youth that I can remember feeling the inspiration and excitement that they do, and that is when Pete Wilson was the youth leader at our church. I was a little young then but I was old enough to understand his sermons and I was inspired by him at a young age. He was young and he knew exactly what needed to be done and at all the right times. He moved onto starting another church in the community and that church grew almost overnight. It was amazing. He is now in Nashville TN preaching at a church there and I have been so excited to be able to listen to his sermons and his thoughts thru the internet. He is one of those guys who has that voice that you never forget and same goes for his lovely wife Brandie. I just wish that I would have had more time with someone like him when I got a little older.
I love God and I am so thankful that my parents raised me in good christian home I only wish that I could be younger again so I too can be as active as these kids are. I now just have to be active in a different way as an adult.

On another note I go Thursday for my ultrasound.....I can not wait I hate waiting. I will update everyone as soon I find out the sex of the baby!

We are never "Lost" we are just "Misplaced"

When Chad and I first started dating almost 10 years ago,(ouch that is hard to believe) he drove me to visit my sister and my dad in Ashland. We decided to do a little back road driving in the hills of W.V. and before long we found our self stopping at an old country store on a secluded road in the middle of the mountains of W.V. to find our way back... I can remember Chad saying "Huh, I hate to admit this but I need help" LOL!!! I was a little scared when we pulled into the parking lot where there was no cars or nobody around. He slowly walked into the store and in a matter of minutes he was walking out of the store, and to my surprise with a smile on his face. He got into the car and looked at me and said that his new saying is "You are never lost just Misplaced" He said that there was an old man in there (the owner of the old store) and When Chad told the man he was lost the man quickly corrected him and said "Son you are never lost just misplaced". We both thought that was a much better way to look at things, and we obviously made it back to my sisters house in one piece. After all these years have passed we have never really talked about that day until last night. We have been traveling all over Savannah GA and Chad quietly said "this is an easy town to get lost in" Even though we had a GPS it worried me for a moment and then he said "But Ashley remember, WE ARE NEVER LOST JUST MISPLACED" I smiled at him and we started talking our drive through W.V. that day almost 10 years ago...It is funny how somethings you just never forget.

We have had a great few days on this vacation. I have so far survived a boat road to see Dolphins,(that's right I said a boat ride aren't you proud of me?), swimming in the Ocean even though a baby shark was caught near were we swam, walking through a haunted Cemetery. And of course lots of other wonderful things... I love spending this time with Chad and Peyton and I know it will be a while before we are able to do this again. It will not be as easy with a baby.

Prayer

I am stressed....I am beyond stressed, I hate it when I think everything is going to turn out just the way I planned and then one thing comes and screws the whole plan up. I am to the point to where I just want to stop what I am doing stand up, walk out, get in my car and DRIVE!! I don't want the stress of life anymore and I just wish I would have done things differently a long time ago.. But it's nobody's fault but my own so I have nobody to point the finger at but meyself....Which doesn't make it any easier. I am mad at people for good reasons but I then again I understand them too... But then I have so many good points to fire back at them, that I know they will not hold a chance to my arguments. But then again, who am I? I can be replaced in a minute, and when I am gone I will be replaced in a minute. I am trying REALLY hard not to overreact and I am trying REALLY hard to give it all to GOD but I can't get passed my worries and hurt and anger to just give it to him. I would love to be that person that can just do that with out problem. There is a plan for me, There is a reason why things happen and now here we go again waiting to see the plan that I soooo hate waiting on. I am tired of waiting on these things to happen.

Please pray for me and my family that the next several months will work out for the best and that God will provide for us in the areas we need help in... Please pray that I can overcome my emotions and be the good christian person that I know I am....

Happy Anniversary to Us

Yesterday Chad and I celebrated 7 wonderful years of marriage....Though we didn't do anything special I still found myself looking at him and smiling like I did when we dated...I love him more than words could say. If not for his hard work and love for our family we could have very well turned down some dark roads. I can still remember the day we got married and everything that took place. It was a simple ceremony that was just perfect for us and if I could do it all over again (with him) I would not change a thing. In 7 years we have seen some pretty amazing things and we have grown in God's love which is the most important. We have a beautiful little girl who amazes us everyday. I can not wait to find out what this next baby is going to be. We leave Saturday to start our Vacation, we will be stopping at the incline railroad, rock city, and ruby falls and then on to Tibee Island GA. I think we are gonna have a great time. I am ready to spend sometime away from everyone... No offense everyone...lol...